As I look back over the last year, one key thing I have been reminded of over and over is this: God is faithful.
Of course, this is something I already knew, but in times of struggle and uncertainty and stress, it is amazing how quickly I forget. I get caught in the worry, the fears, and the “what ifs?” I forget that God is in complete control, and I try to take over. In moments of insecurity, facing the unknown, I unconsciously think that I can do better than Him. Or I convince myself that He has forgotten me.
Yet each time I go back to my Bible, to church, to my friends who are Christ followers, it is so clear and simple: God is faithful. He will provide.
What’s important to remember in this is that, not only does He provide, but He does it in His time. In my own impatience and stubbornness, I often try to speed ahead when I think God is not working fast enough. I try to push forward and force things to happen. And that always ends up in a huge mess.
And again, God gently and graciously reminds me to wait on Him because He will provide at the time that is right.
“Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds?” Luke 12:19
For the last 6 months, I have been support raising as I prepare move to the Czech Republic to be a full time missionary. It has been a rewarding and challenging journey with times of great excitement and times of discouragement.
I would joyfully celebrate each time a new monthly partner signed up, but then weeks would go by without any new partners despite my constant support raising efforts. In those times I would question. I would wonder if I’d ever reach the next goal. What if I didn’t make the 60% of my monthly support needed to attend the Pre-Departure training in October? If I missed the deadline, the next training is not until February 2019, weeks after my planned departure date.
What if I can’t get my Bible courses done in time? What if I can’t pay off all of my debts before I go? What if I can’t raise the $40,000 in upfront costs I need?
What if? What if? What if?
I doubted. I became discouraged. I grew impatient. I let frustration set in. I tried to take control.
“He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” Romans 8:32
Then God said, “Why are you worried? Why do you doubt? I called you to this – I will provide.”
And provide He has, as He always does.
I currently sit at 64% of my monthly support, weeks before the deadline, and I am already registered for the Pre-Departure training in October.
Support is coming in regularly, tickets are selling for my upcoming fundraiser, I have nearly half of my upfront costs, my debts are dwindling steadily, and I’ve completed 3 Bible courses and I’m nearly done the 4th.
Why did I doubt? Why did I worry?
God is faithful.
If we are following Him, and the purpose He has chosen for us, we have nothing to fear. He tells us that again and again throughout the Bible.
This is the God who loved us so much, He sent His only son to die, so that we can be saved!
He loves us so much that He knows the number of hairs on our head!
How amazing is that?
How could we ever doubt His faithfulness?
What could we possibly fear?
For if He is for us, who can stand against us?
I want to live every day in utmost joy, knowing my God provides! Knowing He is faithful! Knowing He knows what’s best for me!
In times of struggle and trial, I pray that I don’t doubt or worry or fear. I pray that I stand firm when faced with uncertainty because I know He is in control.
God is all powerful, relentless in His love, and generous in His provision.
There is no reason to fear.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11